News from the front

I consider this time in our lives to be blissfully uncomplicated when it comes to the “gay thing”. Soon, we as a family and individually, will be faced with coming out with complicated explaining at Vin’s schools, with his new friends etc. etc. etc. Right now I feel we are insulated with a cushion of gay friendliness and it feels pretty good. However, a few weeks ago I was reminded of how the outside world thinks.

At Collin County I have a 71 year old professor friend who teaches math. Carl and I are an unlikely pair who bonded over our irritation of how loud others are in our office. Basically we roll our eyes at each other across the room when someone says something we don’t like. Carl once told me that he “required” his wife to stay home with their kids. When I came out to him he said to me “I knew you guys existed, and I’ve see you on T.V. but I’ve never met one in real life.”
How hysterical is that! The other funny thing about him is that he has tons of questions about our relationship and how Vin was conceived. I happily answer all of them and figure it’s my job to educate the naive. Anyway, I suspect there are a lot of Carl’s in our future, and I just hope they will all be as good natured and open.

In the past few weeks some major events have taken place in the Gay Rights Movement. The Human Rights Campaign reported,

MARRIAGE
“After the Iowa court decision and the historic vote in Vermont, we have DOUBLED – in one week – the number of states that allow loving, committed lesbian and gay couples to marry.
Of course, there is still much work ahead. The California Supreme Court will decide in the next 60 days whether to uphold Proposition 8.”

(Can't seem to make these bigger!)

TAXES
On a less positive note, “ It's tax time. And that means millions of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender Americans will be painfully reminded that they're unequal under federal law. Forced to check that "single" box again, federal law treats LGBT couples as strangers, denying them 1,138 federal benefits and protections enjoyed by married couples. Even if they've married or legally partnered in their state, the "Defense of Marriage Act" denies them every single federal benefit given to married couples. The result? Same-sex couples are taxed about $1000 on their family health insurance—a tax that straight married couples don't have to pay. And even though LGBT Americans pay into Social Security just like everyone else, Social Security does not provide spousal benefits to lesbian and gay couples. Call it the cost of being gay—the cost of being considered strangers under law no matter how committed a family is.”

OUR FAMILY
Lastly, Teri is in the process of legally adopting Vin with a Second Parent Adoption. Our lawyer has run into some road blocks like the judge refusing to grant us a hearing but we are persevering and hope to have a “walk in” appointment in the next few weeks. I’ll keep you posted on our status and we ask for your prayers and support as we pioneer the way for other gay families!
I urge you to take up the fight with us to have our relationships and families recognized by the government. To learn more go to http://www.hrc.org/